Friday, September 29, 2017

One of my Favorite Holidays

Today is one of my favorite holidays, my friends. Today is National Coffee day.

Coffee is more than just a beverage. People have been enjoying coffee in many many ways for many years. Even our country's Founding Fathers enjoyed coffee! There were many people throughout history who had some good things to say about coffee. Here are a few of my favorites:


“The morning cup of coffee has an exhilaration about it which the cheering influence of the afternoon or evening cup of tea cannot be expected to reproduce.”  --Oliver Wendell Holmes

“Among the numerous luxuries of the table…coffee may be considered as one of the most valuable. It excites cheerfulness without intoxication; and the pleasing flow of spirits which it occasions…is never followed by sadness, languor or debility.” --Benjamin Franklin

"I'd rather suffer with coffee than be senseless." --Napoleon Bonaparte 



Whether you boil it in a can like the cowboys of old, pour hot water over the beans like the founding fathers, slow brew it thick as mud like the Italians, or get it Pumpkin Spiced like the basic white girls, today is the day to celebrate your love for this fantastic beverage.

Today, I celebrate by mixing my coffees. Having some McDonald's brewed in the pot and having some Starbucks in the fridge, I simply mixed the two together just because I can and there wasn't enough of either separately for a full cup.

In times past, I have celebrated this day by going to Starbucks and telling them my name was Superman to see if they would put it on the cup. They never disappoint.


Two years ago today, I successfully got them to break a smile by telling them my name was Superman. I highly recommend you try this at your local coffee shop.


Now that you know how I celebrated, let me know how YOU celebrated!

Monday, September 18, 2017

Do you feel a draft?

I guess there's not much I can say. Here is the story of how I killed my beard.




This is me on Saturday. If you look closely, I have a happy, smiling beard positioned on the lower half of my face. My beard is completely unaware of what will befall it just 48 some hours later.
This is the last time I shaved, Glen Rose, TX July 16 2017. I was about to meet my beard. I wasn't sure if I would like it, but it grew on me.



 



So what happened, you ask me. Did I make a manscaping error that resulted in aborting the entire mission? No. Did my neighbors complain that it was attracting too much wildlife? Yes, but that doesn't bother me. Did I lose a bet? No. 

Whatever excuse you're thinking of, the answer is no. It was just time. As sad as I am to see my chin curtain go, it was just time to say "Happy Trails, Saddle Pals," and ride off into the sunset without it. Now, my face is very cold. I barely recognize the man in the mirror. I've lost my wireless connection to Chuck Norris.

Before

After

I sure am going to miss the way it filtered my food and the air I breathed. I sure am going to miss playing the fiddle with it (listen, if you get a chance to play the fiddle while you have a beard, I highly recommend it). My face feels like it has lost all of its swag. Speaking of, you can buy a "Real Mark Wimberley" coffee mug here because I'm really bad at advertising my own merchandise. In spite of this bittersweet moment, I have moved on. This is only the beginning. I may grow something bigger and better next time...a handlebar mustache, Burnside's Sideburns, a mullet, you never know! 

Well, I hope you really enjoy seeing my real face again. I mustache you a question, but unfortunately, I'll shave it for later.