The Story of the Day I (Almost) Died

It was a race against time and nature as the highway ahead ran straight into the storm cell we had seen coming for a long time. The radar showed nothing, and thus deceived us to think it was just a passing shower.

All I can say is, Noah should've had it so easy. The little north Texas town of Electra was about to see a storm that an urban California dude like me would call a "woolyburger", but a rural boy would probably just call it "big".

We had been on the road for three days, trying to make the town of Jefferson before the weekend. The rain came down with such vigor, that we could no longer see the highway before us. Just when we thought we would be drowned with many drowns, the wind kicked up. This wasn't a "Let's go fly a kite" wind, that would be too easy. The wind blew with more enthusiasm than a chubby kid eating ice cream. One by one, the trucks and cars began to pull over to the shoulder, hoping to wait the storm out. We pulled up the radar again as soon as the hail started because we were certain that this wasn't "nothing", even if we were in the open country. The radar showed us a lovely shade of pink right where we were pulled over. Aesthetics aside, pink was as high as the radar could possibly go, which we interpret to mean "hang on, it gets worse".

For what seemed like a month short of eternity, we sat on the side of the road, unable to see the car parked literally feet in front of us, and the hail fell faster. As the wind kicked up to 60mph (no joke), rocking our poor RV violently, we discovered the edges of our windows leaking, and rain coming through the carpet. I suddenly gained an appreciation for all the spiders I've sent down the toilet.

You're probably thinking "you were scared, weren't you Mark?" Guitar pickers never get scared.

I became a mandolin picker during the storm, though.

The weather report calmly assured us it would all be fine if we moved to the lowest floor of our building. I knew we shoulda bought that two story RV!

At long last the weather let up enough for us to see the road. Since we did not tip over or disintegrate, as we almost did, we took off down the road to outrun the rest of storm. Oh the things I go through for bluegrass, risking life and limb to play music once more. The next day found us in as few pieces as possible in sunny Jefferson, TX.

We were happy to be alive, happy to still be in TX, happy to have suffered only very minor damages, and wouldn't wish a storm like that on our enemy.

Except spiders. They still deserve that.